Name: Alrik Khazri Ranulfsson (the first?)
Also known as: OH @#$% RUN, That fat grumpy guy, fatty, "The weird eyed one."
Age: 240-ish. (Lazy, lore makes it hard to work with ages.)
Title: Captain of the First Ironforge Airborne, Archaeologist of the Explorer's League, Bomb Master of the Exploder's League, honorary GEAR member.
Class: Hunter, Technomancer
Sex: Had plenty of it. Oh, male.
Hair: Black. Raven black. As black as Kyltania's soul. As black as JJ's cooking. Really friggin' black in case you don't get the picture.
Eye(s): One brown, the other is a big artifical eye that constantly changes colour.
Weight: Never bothered to check.
Height: Four-foot something.
The most obvious feature of Alrik is his Bale Eye. It seems to act independant of the rest of him, swiveling around to wherever it feels like, even if it means rolling back into his head (which is creepy). It shifts colour from time to time, and when you meet its gaze you have an overwhelming urge to look away. It seems to have an empty feeling to it... As empty as Fizzlepocket's wallet.
Otherwise, this is the most stunningly beautiful dwarf you have ever seen. A mess of scars on the same side of his face as his Bale Eye, a large flowing black beard, and an artificial arm where his right one would be. His head hair is rather unkept and messy, which seems to be a direct opposite of his insanely well-kept beard.
Alrik was born from the awesome power of Ragnaros, Onyxia, and Hogger combined. He is also the twin brother of Arthas and the second cousin of King Terenas (Go figure). Alrik is also the brother's cousin's mother's dog's hole's clone's friend's cousin's mother's dog's hole's clone's friend of Archimonde, so technically he's related to Archimonde.
In reality Alrik's sister is Nymphistra Ranulfsson, his adopted elf sibling who likes building rafts and setting fires. And stabbing. Don't mention the tea cups.
(Real history: Too friggin' long to write. Ask him when he's drunk. Or depressed.